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hunter’s last trip

 

he drowned in the lake

and i didn't find out ‘til

drunk at a party, years later

he was high on dmt

 

like d. m. turner

called the tryptamine a “water spirit” and

drowned in the bathtub on k, entheogenic heroin

what did god look like, did he beckon, send a vision

of the insignificance of safety, a timeless truth?

 

hunter, jesus christ, and should i be naming names?

is the grunginess of this epitaph just a personal projection?

you'd think a man who decides to live a psychedelic life

would have no interest in prettying up his death

and who am i to say it isn't pretty anyway

and what does he care, he's dead

whatever that means

 

i guess there's worse ways to go

but since we've all been briefed on how the brain floods with

naturally-produced dimethyltryptamine

from the pineal gland for the run-up to death (us head hobbyists)

there is a feeling of redundancy to hunter's last trip

really puts the "gratuitous" in

gratuitous grace

 

life is a grace we know we should know

then we go and get drugged

when our space lacks grace

a chemical, ace in the hole

 

"just say no" they told me in school

but it’s not that simple

abstinence is dissonant

and the body speaks in tongues

and the brain got in there, oblique alien organ

whispered so-called secrets to me:

"cleanse the doors, you will see the infinite"

 

but I see the splinter too

like a fractal retinal grain

did hunter see the splinter when he tripped on dmt?

what does he see when he drowns by the docks?

 

this placid passive empire plagued with psychedelic

deaths, maybe it deserves to be overrun, lebensraum

for the foreign hordes, trust-fund hippies

radial pattern of gentrification, quasi-heritage

so many ways to hate, so many people to despise

i don't want to despise anymore, it's not necessary

just emotion, a chemical, addiction

can't write mein kampf when i'm burnt out

though i'm not burnt out just cause i think i am

burnt out, they're just words, chemicals, addictions

 

first world, first class

small business paying the boat bills

not a bad life i would think

and drugs are as evil as life is

no more, no less

 

 

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